Qs & As

What was it like dating unbelievers/non-religious men? Would you do it again? And how do you stay motivated in terms of education and your faith?

Dating unbelievers: it was great while it lasted lol. I actually like all my exes/guys I dated (there aren’t that many of them). Some of them were unbelievers, others questioning believers. At the time my faith wasn’t really as much of a core part of who I am as it is now, so I never really viewed those relationships through the lens of my faith – at least not to as great of an extent as I do now. Would I do it now? No. And it’s tough sometimes, because I know some great guys. But for the life I’m trying to lead? Forget the celibacy and all that jazz – I’m talking about Purpose. You can’t fulfill your God-given purpose with someone who doesn’t believe in it or in Him. I’m talking about Legacy. What will your kids grow up believing? That Santa and the Easter Bunny are the reason for the season? I’m talking about Peace. How many fights and misunderstandings are you setting yourself up for because you choose to spend your weekends serving in Church than on the couch watching a game? Because you want to worship and he doesn’t get it? Who do we go to when there ARE disagreements and fights if you don’t believe that God heals relationships?

There is a reason the Bible warns us about being unequally yolked – and it isn’t because a believer is a better person than an unbeliever – it’s because there is a certain level of compatibility that cannot be achieved outside of the faith, no matter how hard you try.

All-in-all, I do not see myself not dating an unbeliever because I consider them lesser-than – far from it. Rather, it’s all these factors (and many more) that play into this decision I’ve made. And I am not into the whole relationship evangelism thing because I don’t want someone who wants to know God simply because I said so. BUT that’s not to say that if I met someone who was open to knowing more about God, I wouldn’t at least dip a toe.

I don’t know if that makes sense, but yea lol

Motivation: don’t ask about school because I’m clueless on that one LOL. Just finished my final Sem of B-school and I am DONE LMAO. (Well, I still have my capstone project but for the most part i’m done lol) don’t know how I got through this last Sem, because I was OVER it, but I did 😬😬😬

As to my faith, I think people keep me motivated. Community keeps me motivated. Whether it’s at church or specific people in my life. I have friends who hold me accountable and are always available to fellowship. When I fall in some area or the other, they are there to pick me up and remind me of grace and of God’s purpose for me. They are consistently affirming my calling.

And it’s not just people pouring into me, it’s the people I pour into as well that keep me motivated. I can’t tell people about a God I don’t know. I can’t preach what I’m not at the very least trying to practice. I can’t tell people that God is good if they can’t see that goodness in and through me. So I keep pressing in because pouring into people is part of my purpose. Nothing else brings me as much joy and satisfaction and fulfillment as it does. And so I guess in that regard, purpose propels me.

And of course His Spirit. There is a certain joy and sweetness to life that is only found in His presence, so it’s where I consistently want to be.

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