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Qs & As

in Qs & As

I’m bad at hearing God speak I think. Everyone says listen . He’s there. You’ll hear him. But I can’t seem to! Look, I’ve been praying and asking God to speak to me. But I can’t hear Him. What do I have to do? It’s so frustrating. And I’m bad at picking up signs . So if it’s through a book or person . Maybe I’ve missed it. Can’t he appear in a dream? Why is there this barrier? Why can’t I hear Him.

Well love, first off, know that God is always speaking. We’re either not listening or don’t know how to tune in. If I gave you a radio but you didn’t know how to turn it on or how to tune into the station you wanted to listen to, doesn’t mean you or the radio is broken. It just means you need a little more information 🙂 The first step to hearing God is to understand what He ‘sounds’ like. You have to recognize His ‘voice’. ‘Hearing’ God isn’t always what you think. Hearing isn’t always an audible voice – actually it rarely is. Hearing God can be that feeling of peace about a decision. it can be an open door – or a closed one. It can be a dream, vision, deep-seated intuition, divine understanding and instinct. I always refer people to a book my pastor wrote – Contact: The…

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in Qs & As

Hi . This might seem like a very weird question. But is there anywhere in the bible that talks about “if someone wants to be there for you, you don’t have to force or try for their attention?” I’m asking this because, I and my be are going through a rough stage. He asked for space for awhile. And promised to be back. He’s going through some stuff and wants to be alone. But gave me his word and assurance that he was coming right back for me. Now here’s the issue, I believe he’s the one for meand I admit I might have pushed him farther away with my constant nagging . I have apologised and shown how truly sorry I am. But he wants space for now. So I’m doing the only thing I believe works. Praying. I’ve been praying like crazy, because this is whom I really want to spend the rest of my life with. I’m not growing any younger. I’m 25. But the more I pray, doubt creeps in . And then human logic where I start thinking about all these quotes and sayings from “relationship experts” talking about you can’t force someone to be with you bla bla. You know the quotes I’m talking about. So I am just trying to find out from someone who knows the bible pretty well, if there’s anywhere in the bible that talks about forcing yourself on people. This kind of stuff. Because deep down I believe God doesn’t work with what people have said. He does the uncommon. Unexplainable. So I’m trusting Him. But I just need to know if there’s anywhere in the bible that talks about that, maybe so I feel a lot better when praying and not to feel like those relationship experts are actually right. I’m just praying for a miracle. Divine intervention. Anything. I’ve never been so sure about anything . But there’s that little voice that keeps saying, you are wasting your time. He’s not coming back. 😪

Hey Love, I’m so sorry you’re dealing with this. Relationships can be one heck of an emotional roller coaster. As I read your question this verse popped in my head from Song of Solomon 8:4: Promise me, O women of Jerusalem, not to awaken love until the time is right. There is a time for everything. And even if you know in your heart of hearts that it is meant to be, doesn’t mean it’s the right time. When it comes to God and trust and timing, you have to constantly be in chill mode. You have to learn to hold on to things loosely. Maybe he is the one for you – but maybe God knows that if He let you continue together at this point in your lives you’ll destroy it before it can ever bloom into what He has planned. Maybe there is a work He needs…

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in Qs & As

Hello, I am looking for some Christian literature that can help me grow and learn as a young woman in Christ. Any suggestions?

Hi love, Well the Bible is a great place to start! I always like to encourage people not to be dependent on hearsay or someone else’s account of God, because just reading books written about God won’t feed you the way the one written BY Him will. Aside from that, Max Lucado is great all-round. Christine Caine and Lisa Bevere too. And my current fave is Steven Furtick’s Crash the Chatterbox. Mark Batterson’s The Circle Maker changed my life. That being said, most of these aren’t targeted specifically towards women. I’m not a fan of feel-good chick flick ministry. I think too much of women’s ministry is focused on how to get a man, how to wait for a man, how to live with a man, or how to please a man as a good wife. We need less women of God consumed with finding their Boaz and more women…

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in Qs & As

How do you overcome depression and suicidal thoughts. I’ve cried. That was my prayer because I couldn’t get the words out. I have no one to talk to. I don’t think anyone will understand what I’m going through. I am tired

Hey love, These questions are honestly always the hardest for me to answer. For one, I suffered (and sometimes still do suffer) from bouts of depression, and I know sometimes the words of people can be really empty in that state, and I never want to give people empty words. But here’s the advice I can give you, and I hope you will take it as coming from someone who understands what you’re going through and wants you to be healed and whole: 1. Ask for help. Depression and being suicidal are serious issues and if you are not in the state of mind to be in control of your own well-being, you need someone to do it for you. Whether that means calling 911 if you feel like you’re about to self harm (if you’re in the states and have that luxury), or telling a medical professional, or a…

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in Qs & As

What was it like dating unbelievers/non-religious men? Would you do it again? And how do you stay motivated in terms of education and your faith?

Dating unbelievers: it was great while it lasted lol. I actually like all my exes/guys I dated (there aren’t that many of them). Some of them were unbelievers, others questioning believers. At the time my faith wasn’t really as much of a core part of who I am as it is now, so I never really viewed those relationships through the lens of my faith – at least not to as great of an extent as I do now. Would I do it now? No. And it’s tough sometimes, because I know some great guys. But for the life I’m trying to lead? Forget the celibacy and all that jazz – I’m talking about Purpose. You can’t fulfill your God-given purpose with someone who doesn’t believe in it or in Him. I’m talking about Legacy. What will your kids grow up believing? That Santa and the Easter Bunny are the…

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in Qs & As

It’s not easy being an adult! I made the switch from daddypendent to independent about 6 months ago & it’s not a joke at all! I just got paid & I was drawing up budgets for shopping (YAASSSS) & bills & other things then realized I forgot about my tithe… Bruh! Anyway, I’m not as “rich” as I thought & shopping will have to wait until later. The struggle is real but diaris God lol!

Bruuuuuh lmao. It’s too real. I’ve been independent for 8 years now and I can’t say I’ve completely gotten used to taking care of myself. There are still days I wish I could call Daddy up and solicit funds lol. But you know, even on those days when it feels like my paycheck is spread real thin, or the future looks bleak, I never once think of reneging on my commitment to God with tithe, so I love how you chose to defer shopping till later. It’s not an easy choice to make in a world that says everything we earn is ours and for our sole benefit. We can be confident in the fact that in plenty or in little, God will honor our commitment to Him with our finances, and will bless us above and beyond our means to contain it!

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in Qs & As

I-Didn’t-Know-What-To-Write-As-A-Title

There are a few things I do every morning before I leave my bed & one of them is checking your blog for new posts. But before I had a job, I would constantly check (morning, afternoon, evening and in-between) & if it was one of those days when you did not post anything I would wonder to myself, “What is she doing?!” lol. Then one day them same thing happened & I heard a little voice say, “She has a life, she does not live to write blog posts for you!” I started laughing because a. It was true., b. That was God. No two ways about that & He does not mince his words haha! I still check every morning & when it’s an early morning post I am so happy because I can read it before work! And if it’s a long post or a post put…

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in Qs & As

Have you ever gotten the “lower your standards speech”? And how did you deal with it, if yes?

Directly or indirectly, definitely lol. My best friend even coined a term for my former taste in men: ‘Shepeeeh‘, and we both agree that it wasn’t the greatest taste to have. Don’t ask, really lol. But I think more than receive it, of late I’ve found myself sort of giving some variation of it to myself. As you grow older and everyone around you starts getting married off, you kinda get a sort of wake up call when it comes to previously set standards. It’s like, for instance, when the Hot Girl you knew in high school or college ends up with the equivalent of the Cute  Chess Club President instead of the Hot Jock Who Comes From Money that you thought they would. And this is not me saying that the Jock is better than Chess Club dude, or that they lowered their standards at all – quite the contrary since I’ve…

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