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Qs & As

Ask Slayed & Saved: “Questioning My Faith”

Hello! First, I am so excited to have found your blog – it is a breath of fresh air in my life   I am having major issues in my walk with God. I’ve begun to question him and everything surrounding Christianity and I do not want to. I find myself resenting the thought of giving thanks and praise to God, because my mind keeps saying ‘he is wicked; he watches innocent people be killed and die every day, he is going to let some of his children who did not even have the opportunity to know him go to hell, how could this be a loving God worthy of praise?’ That sort of thing. I dislike this a lot and it is seriously tormenting me.

Qs & As

Ask Slayed & Saved: “Questions”

Hi. First of all,let me just say that I am glad I was told about this blog. It has helped me accept certain things I struggled to accept when I started taking my relationship with Christ seriously. Now to why my title is ‘questions’ . I know you don’t have all the answers and I probably should be asking God but I feel like He doesn’t hear me when I talk to him albeit I don’t always do the talking.  I try but whenever I decide to seriously take time off and pray something comes up to distract me and I’m left rushing through a prayer and going on with my day. Either that or I start sleeping.

Qs & As

Letter: God’s not dead, He’s not crazy either.

Sometimes when God tells us something, we think He’s crazy. I’ve had an absolutely crazy year and at the very beginning of 2016 when things seemed to be getting worse, I started getting panic attacks. I would wake up with my heart racing & I would cry and hyperventilate. One morning I was crying & hyperventilating so hard I thought there was no way I would make it to work. Then I heard a small voice say, “Call Eudora”.

Qs & As

How Do I Read the Bible?

Hi, I don’t know how to read my bible. I do devotionals that reference bible verses but I want to actually read the Bible. Where do I start?

Hey love!
There are a lot of different ways to read the Bible, but Devotionals are a great place to start. I’d suggest starting off by reading for context. So when you read those Bible verses that come with the devotionals, read the entire chapter as well. Figure out what exactly the writer wanted to say.
The second way I’d suggest reading it is chronologically – at the beginning. There’s a reason the Bible is in the order it’s in – it tells a story. So start at the beginning and work your way through to the end.

Qs & As

Where Is My Fire?

Hi, I don’t know whether this is really a question but I just wanted to share. All my life I have been the best student, everyone saw me as someone who was going somewhere and would do great things, more importantly I saw myself as that. I felt I had a purpose. Later on, I wasn’t able to go to the uni I wanted and ever since then my life has been on a downward spiral. From the outside, I like normal but I am suffering from a deep depression. I have considered suicide many times, I feel no enthusiasm for anything in life, I have gained so much weight, I have stopped working out I have just given up on life.

Qs & As

Hey, okay from where I’m from. Looks like everyone around me is okay with mediocrity. And I am not. I want to do more and be better. And break free from that. I believe I can be much better and do much better. Recently I wrote an exam for a very reputable multinational firm in Ghana. The exams was very difficult. Very. I saw people around me give up. But I still did what I could. Everyone of my friends made it through except me. I was very heartbroken because this opportunity was going to open many doors for me. Financially and academically. I kept crying and didn’t understand why. I’ve always thought I wasn’t smart enough. But God has always come through for me.So when I didn’t make it, I went on my knees and kept praying. Even though the process was over. A friend of mine who happens to work in the organization. Told his boss about me. And the boss just asked for my name and said he would help me. He will push me through to the next stage so I prove my worth. I was excited and all. But then I started feeling someway. Like was it right. Why am I using protocol. Isn’t that bad.? Some part of me is telling me that it’s God that has opened this particular door for me. Because he knew the exam wouldn’t favor me. Another part is telling me that it’s wrong. And that’s nepotism. Mind you, I didn’t ask for this. I was even surprised when his boss called and asked for my details. He is one of the senior managers there . What do you think? I’m confused.

Hey love. I completely understand where you stand. Two things jumped out at me as I read what you shared: First, that you may perhaps have a very narrow view of success, and second, that favor is not fair.
You say everyone around you is okay with mediocrity – but how is it that you define mediocrity? What is success? Working for a multinational firm? Take it from me personally: what will completely destroy you, your relationships, and your faith in the world we live in today is falling into the trap of having a one-sided view of success, or assuming that because you or others do not fall into this successful box the world has created, then you or they are failures.

Nuggets Qs & As

25 Random Facts About Me

Hello!
It just occurred to me the other day that many people probably have no idea who I am – and it probably doesn’t help that the ‘About Me’ page isn’t really about ME lol. It probably stems from the fact that I hate talking about myself/self-promotion (took me forever to jump on the hashtag bandwagon), but I think it’s only fair that you get to know more about me than the things I struggle with every day.
So here it goes!

I am 26 and the youngest of four kids. By far. My twin brothers and sister are a year apart, and I showed up 6 years later. I joked once to my father that I was clearly the ‘mistake baby’.

Qs & As

I’m entering my final year of university and I have no idea what I want to do with my life. I also have very little experience. I’ve been asking God for my calling, what I should do and where I should go, but I am lost. I don’t have a job atm and I feel like a failure. I know God says otherwise but I just feel down. Help please :(

Darling, you could have 15 years of experience and still not know what you want to do. And you’re never really going to know until you actually try something. But here’s my advice:
1. Start with your passions. Those are from God. They’re already put inside you. Figure out what they are.
2. Ask questions. Ask people who studied what you did, or are passionate about the things you are and made a career out of them, how they did it. Network. Email people you know and ask them to connect you with people they know in those fields. ASK QUESTIONS. INVESTIGATE.

Qs & As

So I’m in that post degree space where I’m done, waiting for my results/to start work, have NO money and I just don’t know what to do with myself? Trying to get out of bed every morning and not have those over extended super late nights and very long lie in’s that people with lots of spare time slip into but I have to keep it real, I’m SO. B O R E D. And I know it’s a dangerous place for me spiritually to lapse into sin. Just wondering if you can think of productive things I can do to pass time?

Hey Love,
I was where you are! There are three things I do in those idle seasons of ‘in-between’:
1. Work out. No better time to get fit than when you have the time to commit to it. Start running, do some at-home workouts. It creates a level of discipline in you that helps you withstand other temptations as well.
2. Watch sermons. Read your Bible. Get fed. There will be times in your life where you will be busy and find it difficult to get fed. This is the time to store up for the ‘winter’.  Get to know God deeper than you ever have, so that in the times when you don’t hear Him as clearly as you’d like to, you have something to live off of.
3. Pour out.

Qs & As

I’m bad at hearing God speak I think. Everyone says listen . He’s there. You’ll hear him. But I can’t seem to! Look, I’ve been praying and asking God to speak to me. But I can’t hear Him. What do I have to do? It’s so frustrating. And I’m bad at picking up signs . So if it’s through a book or person . Maybe I’ve missed it. Can’t he appear in a dream? Why is there this barrier? Why can’t I hear Him.

Well love, first off, know that God is always speaking. We’re either not listening or don’t know how to tune in. If I gave you a radio but you didn’t know how to turn it on or how to tune into the station you wanted to listen to, doesn’t mean you or the radio is broken. It just means you need a little more information 🙂
The first step to hearing God is to understand what He ‘sounds’ like. You have to recognize His ‘voice’.
‘Hearing’ God isn’t always what you think. Hearing isn’t always an audible voice – actually it rarely is. Hearing God can be that feeling of peace about a decision. it can be an open door – or a closed one.

Qs & As

Hi . This might seem like a very weird question. But is there anywhere in the bible that talks about “if someone wants to be there for you, you don’t have to force or try for their attention?” I’m asking this because, I and my be are going through a rough stage. He asked for space for awhile. And promised to be back. He’s going through some stuff and wants to be alone. But gave me his word and assurance that he was coming right back for me. Now here’s the issue, I believe he’s the one for meand I admit I might have pushed him farther away with my constant nagging . I have apologised and shown how truly sorry I am. But he wants space for now. So I’m doing the only thing I believe works. Praying. I’ve been praying like crazy, because this is whom I really want to spend the rest of my life with. I’m not growing any younger. I’m 25. But the more I pray, doubt creeps in . And then human logic where I start thinking about all these quotes and sayings from “relationship experts” talking about you can’t force someone to be with you bla bla. You know the quotes I’m talking about. So I am just trying to find out from someone who knows the bible pretty well, if there’s anywhere in the bible that talks about forcing yourself on people. This kind of stuff. Because deep down I believe God doesn’t work with what people have said. He does the uncommon. Unexplainable. So I’m trusting Him. But I just need to know if there’s anywhere in the bible that talks about that, maybe so I feel a lot better when praying and not to feel like those relationship experts are actually right. I’m just praying for a miracle. Divine intervention. Anything. I’ve never been so sure about anything . But there’s that little voice that keeps saying, you are wasting your time. He’s not coming back. 😪

Hey Love,
I’m so sorry you’re dealing with this. Relationships can be one heck of an emotional roller coaster. As I read your question this verse popped in my head from Song of Solomon 8:4:
Promise me, O women of Jerusalem,
not to awaken love until the time is right.
There is a time for everything. And even if you know in your heart of hearts that it is meant to be, doesn’t mean it’s the right time. When it comes to God and trust and timing, you have to constantly be in chill mode. You have to learn to hold on to things loosely.

Qs & As

Hello, I am looking for some Christian literature that can help me grow and learn as a young woman in Christ. Any suggestions?

Hi love,
Well the Bible is a great place to start! I always like to encourage people not to be dependent on hearsay or someone else’s account of God, because just reading books written about God won’t feed you the way the one written BY Him will.
Aside from that, Max Lucado is great all-round. Christine Caine and Lisa Bevere too. And my current fave is Steven Furtick’s Crash the Chatterbox. Mark Batterson’s The Circle Maker changed my life.
That being said, most of these aren’t targeted specifically towards women. I’m not a fan of feel-good chick flick ministry.

Qs & As

How do you overcome depression and suicidal thoughts. I’ve cried. That was my prayer because I couldn’t get the words out. I have no one to talk to. I don’t think anyone will understand what I’m going through. I am tired

Hey love,
These questions are honestly always the hardest for me to answer. For one, I suffered (and sometimes still do suffer) from bouts of depression, and I know sometimes the words of people can be really empty in that state, and I never want to give people empty words. But here’s the advice I can give you, and I hope you will take it as coming from someone who understands what you’re going through and wants you to be healed and whole:
1. Ask for help. Depression and being suicidal are serious issues and if you are not in the state of mind to be in control of your own well-being, you need someone to do it for you.

Qs & As

What was it like dating unbelievers/non-religious men? Would you do it again? And how do you stay motivated in terms of education and your faith?

Dating unbelievers: it was great while it lasted lol. I actually like all my exes/guys I dated (there aren’t that many of them). Some of them were unbelievers, others questioning believers. At the time my faith wasn’t really as much of a core part of who I am as it is now, so I never really viewed those relationships through the lens of my faith – at least not to as great of an extent as I do now. Would I do it now? No. And it’s tough sometimes, because I know some great guys. But for the life I’m trying to lead? Forget the celibacy and all that jazz – I’m talking about Purpose.

Qs & As

It’s not easy being an adult! I made the switch from daddypendent to independent about 6 months ago & it’s not a joke at all! I just got paid & I was drawing up budgets for shopping (YAASSSS) & bills & other things then realized I forgot about my tithe… Bruh! Anyway, I’m not as “rich” as I thought & shopping will have to wait until later. The struggle is real but diaris God lol!

Bruuuuuh lmao.
It’s too real. I’ve been independent for 8 years now and I can’t say I’ve completely gotten used to taking care of myself. There are still days I wish I could call Daddy up and solicit funds lol.
But you know, even on those days when it feels like my paycheck is spread real thin, or the future looks bleak, I never once think of reneging on my commitment to God with tithe, so I love how you chose to defer shopping till later. It’s not an easy choice to make in a world that says everything we earn is ours and for our sole benefit.

Qs & As

I-Didn’t-Know-What-To-Write-As-A-Title

There are a few things I do every morning before I leave my bed & one of them is checking your blog for new posts. But before I had a job, I would constantly check (morning, afternoon, evening and in-between) & if it was one of those days when you did not post anything I would wonder to myself, “What is she doing?!” lol. Then one day them same thing happened & I heard a little voice say, “She has a life, she does not live to write blog posts for you!” I started laughing because a. It was true., b. That was God.