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Dear Diary

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Conversations with God

Sometimes I still feel like I have to monitor God in some aspects of my life lol I say: “God- can we collaborate on this life thing? Can I give you suggestions about what I want this to look like? Tell you what would work best for me?” And He gives me the side-eye, laughs, and shakes His head. “Child, you had the reigns, and look at where it got you!” He says. “ But,” I protest, “I just need you to know some things about me… you know, my preferences and what-not” “Really?” He chuckles. “Like what? Pray tell.” “Well… like, in terms of the man I want to spend the rest of my life with. I want him to be-” “Wait-” God interjects “Let me get a pen!” He feigns a search for a writing instrument. I frown, but He smiles. “Continue” He says. “I’m listening.” “Well…” I…

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Random Musing

The Christian walk is finding out you’re wrong 70% of the time. (where 70% is being extremely generous lol) We’re constantly learning and unlearning- changing our understanding of right and wrong, good and bad, permissible and acceptable- shifting the scales of our earthly mindset and reconstructing worldly notions until they’re totally balanced in Christ. To be a Christian you have to become OK with being wrong. It’s the most humbling thing in the world.

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Why I Hate Being Asked What I Look for in a Man

Isn’t that the single most tiring question ever? I honestly think by now men should have realized there are certain basic qualities all women are looking for in a man – whether short term or long. No one wants a douchebag. Wealth is good, but drive and passion are even better. Intelligence is a given. I’m really not sure what exactly a dude expects you to say in answering the question that he hasn’t already heard a million times. Sure, there may be some more specific attributes I am looking for in particular that other women might find trivial, but really, the basics are (in no particular order): Indpendence Looks Communication Sense of Humor Intelligence Passion Ambition Confidence Honesty/Transparency Anything beyond that? Don’t ask me. Really. Don’t. Firstly because, well, I really don’t know what I want. Yes, I’ve accepted the fact that I really don’t. Honestly, just think about…

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Musings of A Single Ghanaian Woman In Her Mid-Twenties

As I sit here sipping my usual morning brew of hot lemon water with ginger, praying it’s miraculously imbibed with the same effects as coffee, it dawns on me that I’ll be 25 in just over 3 months. 25. That dreaded point of no return. When you’re young enough to still be single and figuring life out, but old enough to care that you ARE single and haven’t gotten it all figured out yet. And soon others around you start to care too. And 25 is that number for ME. Maybe it was 18 for you, I dunno. I guess it really all depends on where and how you’re raised. There’s something about heading into your late 20s as a Ghanaian woman that causes people to start to expect things from and of you- but not career-wise- they don’t really seem to have a past-due date for that as a…

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Letter to My 21-Year Old Self

Dear Beautiful, You will soon realize for yourself that that’s what you are. Beautiful. And not just on the outside (though knowing that is important too). You are beautiful in your essence. Know that, and you won’t ever need validation. Life is about connecting, with people and with God. If you don’t learn to connect, you’ll soon find yourself drowning with nothing to catch hold of. The most important thing you’ll ever do in this life, is love yourself. And I don’t just mean physically. I mean deeply and intimately. To do this you’ll first have to know yourself, and knowing yourself takes time, and focus. Be patient. Don’t search out love. And don’t be afraid to move on from situations that you think might be love, but turn out not to be. I know it’s scary thinking you’ll never find ‘The One’. And it’s frustrating investing time, energy, and…

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Mumbai Nights

At first I was apprehensive about being, possibly, the only black woman in Mumbai (I caught a glance of this hot journalist-type black guy in a restaurant tonight who I’m fairly certain is my soulmate). Then I went out dancing with my friends… An Indian woman pulled me aside and told me I was so beautiful. Then it dawned on me: I was finally the ‘exotic’ one. Now I know how Lupita feels lol

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